Where to next?

Dress up time with our friend, Zoe
Julia is supposed to be Buzz Lightyear, in case you couldn't figure it out :)
Playing with hotpads, so fun!

We are now back in the normal routine of school, work, etc. I feel like we are in a really good place right now. A big part of that is because we have been healthy for the past month. :) Also, Julia and Isaac are starting to play together. Granted there is still alot of arguing, but it is getting better. Julia is also playing better by herself, an answered prayer! So, of course this leads me to start wondering if God wants us to take another leap of faith. Bethany has been calling us again about foster kids needing a home. We have said no to both cases (which is physically painful for me at the time), but it leads us to start asking the tough questions about what does God want for our family? Do we try an older foster child or another young child? Do we wait awhile before taking in another child? I am often praying, "Lord, please give us abundantly clear direction!" It is always hard to be realistic about what one can handle, but also realizing that God doesn't call us to lead a "complacent" life.

So, now you all have a small glimpse into our thoughts these days. :) We would appreciate your prayers too as we discern God's will for our family, thanks!

An end and a beginning

Today was the court hearing. The judge decided to terminate both of his parent's rights. It was a very emotional experience this morning. We are so grateful the judge terminated the parental rights. His parents have not shown interest in his life and Cardale deserves a family who loves him unconditionally. It was hard to sit in court and hear all of the history leading up to this decision. I have many mixed emotions today. I know the right decision was made, but I am sad for what Cardale is losing. Someday he'll wonder why his birthparents couldn't be parents. However, I know God has a great future for Cardale. He is going to be surrounded by people who love him. I keep thinking of Jeramiah 29:11 "For I know the plans I have for you, says the Lord, "plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you a hope and a future."

Now we are waiting for the state to process Ryan and Jenn's foster care license. As soon as that comes back, Cardale can move in with them. We are hoping the license comes in the next couple of weeks. Pray that we all have patience as we wait. Continue to pray for Cardale during this transition. Thanks to all of you who have supported us on this journey with Cardale!

Pictures

You know we live in MI when the kids get excited about sunshine. They were running in circles.

Isaac taking Cardale for a ride.

It looks like Cardale is going to get a shovel to the back of the head, I promise he didn't.:)

Trying to clear off the deck. Isaac and Cardale are helping the process.

Visiting the Shedd Aquarium

My husband mentioned that I haven't posted pictures in awhile, and looking back I realize that is true. These past couple months I've been in a funk I guess. I haven't taken many pictures in general.

We had a nice weekend trip to Chicago. We visited a children's museum in Naperville, IL and it was great. The kids easily spent a couple of hours there. If you do go, bring an extra pair of clothes! They have a big water area for the kids and Isaac was soaked. We spent one night at my grandparent's house (thank you!). We then drove downtown and visited the Shedd Aquarium. That was a mistake. The oceanarium section is closed for construction, and that is really the best part of the museum. So we didn't last long there. We took public buses which was fun for Caleb. We then spent a night at a hotel downtown. The hotel was nice, but none of us slept much. Isaac was up all night coughing. Thankfully we drove home the next day. Cardale did well over the weekend too. The family had 3 kids so he had lots of attention.

We also got a little update on Cardale's situation. I can't go into lots of detail, but it looks like the parental rights might be terminated in the next couple of months. Again, nothing is certain in foster care until it actually happens. If it does happen then he will be put up for adoption. And no, we're not planning on adopting him. Please be praying for Cardale's future, his Mom, and the judge- that good decisions will be made. We know God has a plan for Cardale, but it's hard to be patient and wait to see what the plan is.:)

Weekend Update

I just got back from an overnight MOPS retreat. It was great to get away with the other leaders and reconnect, relax, and plan for MOPS. I am no longer the MOPS Coordinator so it is nice to have less responsibilities. Now I am in charge of Moppets, the program for the kids. Nate and the kids had a good day without me so that makes the weekend more enjoyable for everyone.:)

I volunteered in Caleb's class this week. I enjoyed meeting the kids he talks about and observing how he acts. Being there put my fears to rest about how Caleb does at school. He was very talkative and got along with the other kids.

I'm taking Cardale to the Dr. on Monday. He is 11 months old and still can not eat Cheerios, table food, etc. without gagging and throwing up. Hopefully the Dr. can order some tests and figure out what is going on. I would like to start solving the problem before he goes home. The transition back to his Mom will be hard enough, I don't want her to be further stressed by his eating problems.

Cardale has started taking steps on his own which is exciting! We also have a family watching him for the week we are going to NY. It will be nice to have a vacation with only 2 kids. I know some people do not understand why we would choose to leave Cardale behind. But, foster parents are encouraged to use respite care so you can focus on your own family sometimes. So, if you don't agree with us using respite care- please keep your thoughts to yourself! The decision was hard enough with lots of guilt in there that we don't need anymore.:)

So we leave for NY on Friday night. We're hoping to see some of our NY friends along with Nate's parents and Reuben's family. Should be a good time!

Fourth of July

Going for a bike ride with Dad!
Caleb went fishing for the first time and loved it.

We had a very nice holiday weekend. We went to my grandparent's cottage in WI and my sister rode along with us. The trip out there was so long! Traffic was horrible and it took us 7 hours. Cardale is a champion traveler though! Isaac doesn't like being confined for any period of time.:) We had a relaxing time there. Some of my extended family was there and they helped out alot with the kids. The weather was perfect! I went waterskiing for the first time in a couple years. Last year I was pregnant and couldn't go. It was such a great feeling. It was like all the responsibility fell off my shoulders. I wasn't a mother of three anymore- I just felt like I was 16 again! We also did some kayaking and dragged Caleb on a boat ride. He was pretty much scared the whole time and kept asking when the ride would be done. Maybe he'll like it more next year.

Yesterday we went to a foster care picnic that Bethany put on. I'm glad we went. It was encouraging to talk with other foster parents. To be reassured that we're doing a good thing, that no our kids are not going to be scarred for life, and that it's ok and normal to not always like being foster parents. There are definitely moments when Nate and I say, "Can you imagine how easy life would be right now with only two kids?" But, we just have to look at Cardale to realize that we wouldn't want to change anything.

How about some positive news!

Cardale chilling in his stroller
Grandpa keeping Isaac happy with food

Diaper changes wait for no one!

Earlier this year Nate and I made reservations at Yankee Springs Campground to go camping with the boys. Our plans had to change once Cardale came along. No way we could sleep in a tent with two babies!:) So Nate and Caleb went camping while I took the babies to my parent's house. My parents live about 20 minutes from the campground, so we could stop by for an afternoon. Caleb loves camping just as much as Nate. They had a really fun time together. I enjoyed being at my parents and getting some extra help. It would have been hard camping with Isaac. He is crawling, but not walking and puts everything in his mouth. It would have been difficult to keep him happy at the campsite b/c it was kind of muddy. At one point we put Isaac and Caleb in the tent to play. Isaac did not like that and was pressing his face against the screen and screaming. Caleb was yelling at us, "I don't want to be in here with him!" The adults found it quite funny.

Cardale is a completely different baby! Now that he is feeling better he is more content and happy. His appetite is better and he's not as clingy. Thank you for all your prayers! I definitely have the tough moments, but not as bad as last week!

Latest Developments

So can you tell I decompress in the evening by blogging?:) Cardale (and us) had another stressful couple of days. On Monday evening we noticed that he was getting a rash and thought maybe it was an allergic reaction to the amoxicillin. He slept horribly that night, the rash spread, he was irritable and noticeably itchy. Most of Tuesday was spent trying to see a doctor (that story would take too long). Eventually we saw a PA who told us it was just heat rash and to keep giving him the antibiotic. I didn't agree with that diagnosis and neither did my Mom, so we disregarded it. (By the way, Deb and Renee, I'm not bashing PA's, just this particular one!) Cardale saw the Dr. today and he agreed it was an allergic reaction to amoxicillin.

It has been a rough 10 days for Cardale and our family. We knew foster care would be hard, but you never know what "hard" means until you're in it. I felt like today we are starting to see some sun through the clouds. Cardale is starting to make eye contact with us and he actually laughed a couple times. I wish I had a picture of myself yesterday. I did my first outing with all 3 kids. I had the diaper bag over my shoulder, carried Cardale in the infant carseat, had Isaac on my hip, and Caleb holding onto the diaper bag. I felt like a pack mule!:) I don't think I'll be doing many trips on my own with the kids.:)

Oh, and I forgot to mention last week that we got the results from Isaac's allergy test. He does have a milk allergy. He isn't allergic to any other foods, so that is a blessing. The Dr. said he may outgrow it in 6-12 months, we'll have to see. Now I need to learn how to cook dairy-free!

Thank You

I want to say, "Thank you!" I truly appreciate all of your comments. Your encouragement and support as we provide foster care is so helpful. These first couple of days have been stressful and I definitely have times when I wonder why we agreed to this in the first place. God has been encouraging us through you and verses I've been coming across.

My Mom was here helping the past two days, she was a huge help! Cardale was making progress and not crying everytime we put him down. However, he came down with a cold last night and was up every two hours and very cranky today.

I had a new experience today. I went to the county WIC office to get Cardale signed up for his benefits. Being a social worker, I always had clients who used WIC, but I had no personal experience with it. It is nice because Cardale's formula and baby cereal is covered by WIC. It is hard being a foster parent because you don't know much information about the child's medical background. So I answer alot of questions with, "I don't know."

We're thinking about hiring a junior high girl to help me out a couple times a week for a couple of hours. Hopefully that works out.

And Baby Makes 5

We have another baby in the house! Today we picked up baby Cardale. He is a foster child who will be staying with us for we don't know how long. He is 6 months old and a lightweight compared to our boys! So far he is a happy baby. He has been smiling at us and likes watching the boys. We've been prepping Caleb about another baby in the house and he is really excited today. He couldn't wait to meet Cardale and he has been very helpful. Isaac's reaction was adorable. He had just gotten up from his nap and Nate brought him downstairs to me. I was holding Cardale and Isaac just stared at him. Slowly Isaac's face went from one of interest to teary eyes and trembling lips to crying. Basically he was saying, "what is that baby doing on my Mom's lap?!" Isaac has since warmed up to him.

So life is going to be interesting around here. I love the last picture. I have that, "what did I get myself into?" look on my face. But, we feel God is calling us to this and we're trying to remember to not worry about tomorrow and know that we can do all things through Christ who gives us strength. We would appreciate all of your prayers!